Happy New Atlanticans Celebrate Canada Day 2007

Despite concerns raised over large gatherings of the populace by authorities since the collapse of the regional health summit, Tantrama City joined the rest of New Atlantica and all of Canada celebrating the national holiday, except of course for Quebec which celebrated Jean Baptiste Day last week and the Congregation of Alberta since Deacon Harper's passing of The Declaration of the Four Humilities last spring.

Highlights of the great day in the new capital included:

• The Saskatchewan Unicycle Team taking its one-wheeled call for national unity to the people of the nation's new eastern region, their message being summed up in their motto "one nation, one wheel" as provided in their alarmingly anti-Congregationalist anti-Lanarkist pamphlets.


• The RCMP Auxillary Musical Ride which entertained and disappointed due to its last minute substitution for the actual RCMP Musical Ride. Children, however, laughed at the two legged horses while adults just laughed.


• The Tatamagouch Colour Guard including the sole peace officer for much of the North Shore of Nova Scotia, leading to the unfortunate scenes of burning highway barriers, vandalism, celebratory gun-firing and public bootleggery there towards the end of the day of national celebration.


• Irene Chisholm of Riverview, New Brunswick and her earnest but little understood personal "Plant a Tree" campaign, an annual event since her personal schism with the national Arbour Day campaign celebrated each April.


• Kenny Lundrigan of Sheet Harbour, Nova Scotia and his rendition of "Pink Shorts for Canada", a real crowd pleaser if judged by the hoots and hollers of the crowd at the grand plaza.


• The wrap-up to the day of fun, Federal Minister of Regional Affairs Graham's celemonial start to the fireworks display which included a dramatic and somewhat telling rendition of the traditional "burning school house" in the form of the House of Commons.

Cleatus Morris, right, First Admiral and Deputy First Minister Designate of the Tantrama City Provisional Government addressed the dwindling crowds after the last of the fireworks, thanking all the participants as well as Minister Graham, then bellowing something into the microphone to the effect of "Vive Canada! Vive New Atlantica! Vive New Altantic Leeeee-bra!!!" stumbling and falling near the end with glee as if intoxicated, before being caught in the arms of a clearly shocked Minister Graham.